Imagine if our negative feelings, or at least lots of them, turned out to be illusions, and we could dispel them by just contemplating them from a particular vantage point.

The key to using optimism to enhance resilience is in rejecting black-and-white, either/or thinking. Resilient people use both optimism and pessimism strategically to gain the critical insights and information they need to adjust to change.

A “no-nonsense” woman is “cold,” “bitchy,” and disliked. If she expresses frustration or anger at being treated unfairly, or even asks for help, she is considered less competent and less deserving of pay or reward.