High Conflict: Why We Get Trapped and How We Get Out by Amanda Ripley

High Conflict

Subtitle: Why We Get Trapped and How We Get Out

Author: Amanda Ripley

Genre: Nonfiction

Format: Digital Purchase

Publish Date: April 2021

Read: April 2024

Favorite Quote: When conflict escalates past a certain point, the conflict itself takes charge. The original facts and forces that led to the dispute fade into the background. The us-versus-them dynamic takes over. Actual differences of opinion on health care policy or immigration stop mattering, and the conflict becomes its own reality. High conflict is the invisible hand of our time.

Synopsis: Amanda Ripley seeks to understand what happens when people who are in arguments end up in full-blown feuds. She first explores the world of legal mediation with a California expert. Through the lenses of divorce, generational feuds, and broad politics, Ripley explores how and why people get stuck in a specific mindset and create an us-versus-them dynamic. Too often, people lose sight of the healthy conflict and dig into the need to be right and/or the win-at-all-costs mentality. Ripley learns when people can step back and focus on the people involved, conflict can deescalate and move toward resolution.

Why does this book beguile? High Conflict is an interesting book dealing specifically with conflict, which is all around us. Ripley believes life without any conflict is boring, uninteresting, and lacking in growth - I happen to agree. However, from the Hatfields & McCoys to discussion around immigration policy, people become so entrenched in a belief or idealized outcome, they are unable to climb out of the trap of this high conflict.

I liked the book, and I like how it specifically focuses on conflict, which is an ever-present part of life. However, if I were to recommend a book, I’d recommend Dare to Lead by Brene Brown because not only does Brown address conflict, but also gives ways to be vulnerable and have both sides come together to achieve a common goal. High Conflict would be a great book for a workplace book club or any group with a wide variety of opinions and a common goal.

Rating: 4/5

Link*: High Conflict: Why We Get Trapped and How We Get Out by Amanda Ripley

If you’re interested in this, read*: Dare to Lead by Brene Brown